If you are thinking of hiring a creative coach, you might also wonder what the coaching process feels like. What issues can I help you with? What results can you achieve and when?
To give you a better idea of what coaching is about, I would like to share a journey inspired by one of my clients. By connecting to his purpose and understanding what was holding him back, he could take back power in his life and start designing a more creative future.
May his experience inspire you to follow a similar path!
In Coaching, As In Nature, There Is Often A Moment In Which The Old And The New Coexist.
After a few sessions, many of my clients sense a tension between their developing, more creative, and confident selves and their old self-doubting, perfectionistic and people-pleasing selves.
A part of them wants to grab a paintbrush or camera, tackle that short story, implement that bold new idea in their business, or press publish on their latest blog post.
The other part tells them to pause and reread; that no one will be interested, that it is just another hair-brained scheme, and they won’t be loved for changing the status quo.
My client Aramis was in precisely this situation when he came to our Tuesday session a while back.
He had come to me wishing to discover more about his life’s purpose. Despite quite enjoying his job, he had developed a passionate interest in ecology, landscape gardening, and blogging, which led him to question his path in life.
What did this new passion mean for his future? How could he develop this exciting activity, find the courage to pursue it, and where would this lead? We set out to answer these questions in our coaching sessions.
In the discovery session, we explored Aramis’s life purpose. Diving deep inside, he saw himself as the eco-garden artist who transforms his client’s gardens into surprising, creative, and sustainable experiences.
Buoyed by the revelation, Aramis set out to integrate more of the eco-artist spirit into his life and free time.
Every time he embarked on a new project, however, he found that his initial enthusiasm vaned. Often he would give up.
Discovering The Saboteurs
Disheartened, he brought his experiences to a session. We discovered he had two very persistent saboteurs holding him back by attentively listening to what voices whispered when he started thinking of a new endeavour.
The first was a desire to please and put other people’s needs before his own. As the oldest of four and son of parents who worked long hours to make ends meet, he grew up as his siblings’ primary caregiver. Helping others, often at the expense of his requirements and creative impulses, had become a second skin and the currency through which he found his place in life.
The second was a fierce perfectionism that regularly stopped him from launching a creative project by making him aware from the very beginning that no outcome could ever match his expectations.
Armed with this knowledge, Aramis gradually became more aware of his inner voices and could label them as they popped up in his life.
The Turning Point
A turning point came whilst he was untangling the inner struggle he was experiencing while dealing with a tough job-related decision.
During the coaching session, he realised that, on the one hand, he was negotiating with his old and trusted people-pleasing and perfectionist self. On the other, however, a new and confident part of him asked that he step up and act with more courage and authenticity.
In Aramis, the old voices now co-existed with a new one.
Despite the inner conflict, he could now choose between his past and present self. He could direct his actions rather than let old patterns unconsciously determine his actions.
Over the following months, I witnessed Aramis experience this inner struggle and become more adept at recognising the different parts. His explorations lead him to make more courageous and authentic choices.
He is still not sure where this journey will lead. However, he believes that finding support and exploring his own inner landscape has helped him significantly increase his confidence, self-knowledge, and the fulfilment he feels in life.
To Be At Choice
As in Aramis’ case, moments of transition, when old and new co-exists, can be challenging.
From an emotional and energetic point of view, the process is more draining than bowing one’s head to a familiar negative voice.
However, these instances are a significant step forward from a personal perspective. They signpost an awareness of what is holding one back and the development of new patterns or behaviours. It is thanks to them that we can be at choice.
And choice is perhaps the true gold that we find along the coaching path. We live much of our life in tension between contrasting parts of our being. With courage, support, and patience, we can learn about them, face them, and forge our unique path forward.
The art is in the awareness, the journey in our choices.
How About You?
Curious to develop your self-awareness and amplify your choices?
Sign up for a free chemistry session if you are ready to move beyond what is holding you back in your journey and design a more authentic and creative life!